I find myself saying these words over and over again, but I never have anything to follow it up. In the morning, literally within 5 minutes of waking up, I’m thinking to myself “I can’t wait.” I think this comes from too much anticipation of the next moment and not living in the moment enough. I sometimes feel like I wish my life away. I blame this on my parents. Wait, wait, I’m not being a bad daughter but when we were in Alaska I noticed that my mom was always thinking of the next step, and sometimes losing out on the current activity. For instance if we had just arrived back at the room to rest a little bit, mom was thinking about leaving to get dinner or picking up my niece. This most likely comes from raising 3 children and always having to have everything planned out. So really I’m not criticizing, I’m just realizing why I’m always in anticipation of something else.
My family also was always hours early to any event. For instance if we had to be somewhere by 9:15 a.m., and it was a 45 minute drive, we would leave at 7:30 a.m. Which meant growing up spending a lot of time in the car waiting. I probably started my “I Can’t Wait Syndrome” there, sitting in the car, waiting to get out of it and being bored.
So I’ve decided that I need to concentrate on redirecting my brain away from this phrase. That I need to live more in the moment and less on what may or may not happen in the future. Purely in a literal life and knitting life conception, not in a spiritual aspect. But I need to be content with what is happening now and not be so caught up in wishing my life away.
With knitting I need to not worry about deadlines or dates, and just enjoy the prospect. I find myself constantly crunching numbers mathematically to determine when I may finish a project. I’m going to focus on stopping that habit and simply enjoy the process. That being said the bedspread on size US 1 needles, may be a 41st wedding anniversary present and not the 40th. But I’m okay with that.
Fortunately my sister’s afghan for her 25th is going spledidly and will in fact be done for the 25th. But then if it wasn’t, that would be okay too, after all we are still waiting on our wedding present. hee hee. My sister and brother-in-law were going to build us an entertainment system for our wedding present, we’ve been married 13 years this fall. hee hee, but Kat really, we don’t need it and I’m just teasing you. Maybe for my 25th anniversary, you can knit me an afghan. Love you big sister.